Appreciation of Singleness

Where are all the single people? Put all your hands in the air! Just like the DJ says in the spanish clubs and party events; ¿Dónde están las mujeres que no tienen marido? “Where are the ladies that don’t have a husband?”. Also, what beyonce would say’ “All the single ladies put your hands up!”

This is what they would say to all the single ladies in the room in those times(pre panoramic). We can all agree that being single is a season of exploring, venturing, discovering future partners and along with other stuff. With each person we date, we learn something about ourselves. We add or subtract what we want and don’t want in our lives.

I personally feel like single ladies are worse than a bitter baby momma because they judge everyone and their momma. They have an opinion for the married, the ones in committed relationships, baby momma drama and the ones open with open dating and sex life which is a worse situation because when someone is dating in the spot life they are giving opinions that wasn’t even asked for to begin with. And somehow they seem to have the best advice when it comes to those who are dealing with boy drama. 

Lori Harvey is a Hollywood celebrity,she is the daughter of Steve Harvey. She has dated celebrities like Future, Trey songz, diddy and his son Justin Combs as to be rumored and people look at her like she’s the evil stepmother. Truth be told, many people disagree with her dating history. This is what dating looks like even with those she has not gone public with. Just like her, you need to keep your options open because the dating life is unpredictable. Dating is enjoying the company of someone. You are testing the waters before diving in completely and if you don’t like it  , you can get out. 

The dating life has been different from the old days. Within the 21st century there are dating apps, social media, community groups based on interest and likes. The options to meet someone is an open pond of fishes, meaning that the options are endless. You can meet for a date in different places such as a school, park, sports, bar, or even at their designated job. With all these ways of meeting “the one”; single people get stuck in situationships.Which is far worse than the people they are judging, if you ask me. They get comfortable with the familiarities instead of getting uncomfortable with new people who are interested in dating them and willingly to commit to what they are asking for. 

Ladies, if you are single, it’s okay. Don’t be ashamed of it. EMBRACE IT. Coming from someone that is single just like you, just take it easy on yourself and don’t jump to the wedding conclusion lol. Enjoy the season that you are in right now because there will be a time that you are going to miss being single.

Dating is to be seen as hard because applications and interviews have to be made before signing the contract to be someone’s legal partner. Sometimes we rush things and try to desperately find the perfect partner for a marriage. There are a lot of considerations that go along with finding the perfect person. As much as we consider the other person and their traits, we don’t consider our own traits as individuals. We go into relationships and marriages because of loneliness without any consideration of the flaws, trauma and history we have endured as an individual without thinking how much of a reflection it will make in the relationship. People get into relationships without creating better versions of themselves. Then go into the relationship and the problem they don’t fix, it becomes the big elephant in the room. Some issues are trust issues,lack of self love, commitment issues, not having hobbies of their own, codependency, bad habits and deal breakers. A Lot of things come into play in relationships and if we don’t address it BEFORE getting into relationships we tend to harm the person in the relationship with us. 

Yes single people, you can date all you want, whoever you want, do whatever it is you want as a single person however before jumping into a relationship make a reflection of what you need to fix yourself. Just as many others have flaws, so do we. It’s easier to fix them alone as opposed to dragging someone else into your mess; expecting them to fix you. 

YES I COMPLETELY UNDERSTAND that it can be lonely, isolating, and a little weird. However, it’s not your timing yet. This season is different for the time being. Enjoy it while you have it. Get to know yourself and create a lifestyle for yourself that wouldn’t change once you have a partner so the relationship doesn’t become the main picture and you end up losing yourself.

Guys in the comments below, tell me your dating experiences and what you do as a single person. If you arent single tell me what are things you learned being single. Catch you on the flip side, Thank you for reading till next time, toodles, peace out <3.

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