Obtaining healing is the best thing we could do for ourselves. Healing allows us as humans to step back and reflect from a pure perspective, instead of looking at things from a blurry lens. Lens that causes our thoughts to be all over the place.
You see, healing offers to clean up the blur from our lens. Healing offers us wise decisions, healthy relationships, boundaries, respect and self love. Healing allows you to walk away even if things are unresolved, simply because you’ve come to the conclusion that your sanity is not worth the misery.
People, places and things can break us without us realizing it. We realize the impact of the amount of brokenness that we are left with, once we open up to someone else. And in that unforgettable moment, the lightbulb in your head turns on. That moment comes with a feeling in our throat as conversation flows. This is one way that tells us that we may need some healing.
Although there are multiple reasons why we may be broken or need healing, what happened is real and something must be done about it because this is important. You can sit with it, soon or later you will have to unpack, touch and dissect every bit of what is keeping you broken. Healing is not a walk in the park but you can gather the puzzle pieces together, by taking the first step.
You have to identify the triggers. Allow yourself to let it out. Walking around broken, brings feelings that make you feel attacked and offended by someone or something. It allows you to know that these emotions are being triggered and need to be dealt with. These feelings are there to tell you that you are hurting. You can no longer walk around unhealed.
Friend, I am not an expert but I’ve dealt with being broken. From what I have yet to experience, I’ve learned so much about myself by accepting healing. Being unhealed I did things and made decisions out of emotions and led me to situations and circumstances that were not supposed to happen.
Accepting healing gives you serenity and peace. Each “time clock” is different for you than what it was for me and I can reassure you that it is not easy but it is worth it.
I bet you’re asking why me and why not you? Guess what the things I did were uncalled for. I would do things for the approval of others, at times I disregarded; my value and my own existence.
I tried to win the approval of my father. I did everything that I could for him to see me. Then I quickly learned that he did not care if I wasn’t alive. He did not want to see me which led me to feeling broken and having daddy issues. It dawned on me that I was asking for validation and approval from others.
I would also compete with other girls because I wanted them to know that I am just as capable and beautiful as them. I also wanted to be part of the “group” that made it to the next round like a beauty pageant. This resulted in the fact that I wanted to be normal like everyone else, when in actuality I was special in my own unique way.
Lastly, I went out of my way trying to show boys that I was the woman of their dreams and not the side piece even though that’s all they ever seen me as or even worse a sex toy that they wanted to play around with and then stop whenever they wanted to because I wasn’t their girlfriend and commitment was too much for them.
Based on different circumstances reflects someone’s perspective that leads to being broken .I understand that certain people do things to numb the pain. This is a short form of happiness. In the long run this is only hurting us even more. I used to be that person, I will do this to avoid the real problem that I was facing deep down inside. Problems that stemmed from my childhood. Anytime someone or something comes across this trauma; I will scream, yell and even cry. I will do this to express myself because I felt silenced by others. This method did not help me nor did it help those around me.
I am learning how to speak more about this to those who are willing to listen. I do this with the intention of not swallowing my feelings and sitting on it. Although crying is my instant reaction, this is an indication to me that I am still healing.
Being broken and going through healing has taught me alot about myself. I don’t overdo things like I used to, I am more confident in myself and I am learning more about myself. What is for me, is for me and it would never pass me. Focusing on the things that are necessary for my future. prioritizing myself. Things happen, whether it was good or bad, my outcome is determined by my actions within the present to have a healthy and successful future. As much I learned this through my awareness of needing healing I also learned healing takes different steps for each human. My healing journey takes as much time as I need to process. I’m learning how to set boundaries, creating a healthy lifestyle with habits and routines that is beneficial to me and for me. Along with listening to my feelings, taking care of my mental health and taking care of the open wounds that are bleeding.
With that being said friends, healing happens in different aspects, the way you heal is different for the person next to you. Dont judge, Take care of yourself with what’s healthy for you and take necessary steps to bring yourself awareness of your healing journey .
If anything regards to healing, teach, educate and talk to me in the comments below so I can learn different ways of healing.Be easy on yourself and those around you… Thank you for reading. I appreciate it so much and I will catch you on the next reading. Air hugs, toodles, peace
Ashley Merlanie 